He's had some other shows on You Tube:
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Ok, so this isn't really a joke, but it is some pretty funny sh** you can pull on your friends and call it magic. Brian Brushwood is a magician from Austin TX and a friend of my wife's. He's pretty funny. Check out his new show Scam School. It's also available on iTunes as a free download.
He's had some other shows on You Tube:
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HOW COOL WERE YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL?
This is a pretty cool test, check it out.
This test is based on how cool you were in High School--what crowd you ran with, etc., it 's pretty accurate.
You may want to send it to your friends to see if they've changed.
LET'S SEE IF YOU ARE A COOL PERSON:
http://www.sailinganarchy.com/genera.../cool_test.htmLeave a comment:
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A man walks in to a sex shop to buy a blow up doll
Man says, "I would like to buy a blow up doll."
Clerk- "Male or Female?"
Man- "Female."
Clerk- "White or Black?"
Man- "White."
Clerk- "Christian or Muslim?"
Man- "What does religion have to do with it?"
Clerk- "The Muslim one blows itself up!"Leave a comment:
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LITTLE PERSONAL ADVISE…
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to
take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take
it out on someone you don't know.
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten
to make. I found the number and dialed it.
A man answered, saying "Hello."
I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robin Carter?
Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that
anyone could be so rude.
I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had
transposed the last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up
with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy
answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an a$$hole!" and hung up I
wrote his number down with the word 'a$$hole' next to it, and put it
in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or
had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an a$$hole!"
It always cheered me up.
When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'a$$hole'
calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi,
this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if
you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?" He yelled "NO!" and slammed down
the phone.
I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an a$$hole!"
One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking
spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had
patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting
for that spot. The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in
his car window, so I wrote down his number.
A couple of days later, right after calling the first a$$hole (I
had his number on speed dial), I thought that I'd better call the BMW
a$$hole, too.
I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
"Yes, It is."
"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and
the car's parked right out in front."
"What's your name?" I asked.
"My name is Don Hansen," he said.
"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
"I'm home every evening after five."
"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
Yes?"
"Don, you're an a$$hole." Then I hung up, and added his number to
my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two a$$holes to
call.
Then I came up with an idea. I called A$$hole #1.
"Hello."
"You're an a$$hole!" (But I didn't hang up.)
"Are you still there?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said
"Stop calling me," he screamed.
"Make me," I said.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"My name is Don Hansen"
"Yeah? Where do you live?"
"*******, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with
my black Beamer parked in front."
He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better
start saying your prayers."
I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, a$$hole."
Then I called A$$hole #2. "Hello?" he said.
"Hello, a$$hole," I said.
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."
"You'll what?" I said.
I'll kick your a$$," he exclaimed.
I answered, "Well, a$$hole, here's your chance. I'm coming over
right now."
Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I
lived at 1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to
kill my gay lover.
Then I called Channel 13 News about the gang war going down on
West 34th Street.
I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street.
There I saw two a$$holes beating the crap out of each other in
front of six squad cars, a police helicopter and a news crew.
NOW I feel much better.
You know, this anger management stuff really works!!!!!Leave a comment:
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GOLF'S WORST FOURSOME
1. MONICA LEWINSKI
2. O. J. SIMPSON
3. TED KENNEDY
4. BILL CLINTON
WHY YOU ASK?
Well, you're going to love this!<
1. MONICA IS A HOOKER
2. O. J. IS A SLICER
3. TED CAN'T DRIVE OVER WATER, AND
4. BILL CAN'T REMEMBER WHICH HOLE HE PLAYED LAST.Leave a comment:
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What's the difference between stuffing your wife in the trunk of your car and stuffing your dog in the trunk of a car?
Answer: Your dog will still be happy to see you when you open the trunk!Leave a comment:
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One winter morning a husband and wife in northern Michigan Were Listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the Announcer Say, "We are Going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must Park your car on the Even-numbered side of the street, so the Snowplows can Get through." So the good wife went out and moved Her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast again, The radio Announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the treet, so The snowplows can get through." The good wife went out and Moved Her car again.
The next week they are again having breakfast, when The radio Announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of Snow today. You must park.." Then the electric power went out. The good wife Was very upset, and with a worried look On her face she said, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of The street do I Need to park on so the snowplows can get through?"
With the love and understanding in his voice that all Men who are Married to Blondes exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you Just leave it in the garage this time."Leave a comment:
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So I got this in a txt the other day.
After a recent study, scientists have determined that at some point, ALL women will be filled with intelligent DNA.
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Unfortunately, 95% of them will spit it out!Leave a comment:
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An old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him.
She turned to the cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?'
He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows,going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy.'
She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women.
As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women.
When I shower, I think about women.
When I watch TV, I think about women.
I even think about women when I eat.
It seems that everything makes me think of women'
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?'
He replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just found out that I'm a lesbian'Leave a comment:
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